Seven Simple Steps

For the past few posts, I’ve been focusing on problem resolution. This may seem less uplifting than some subjects, but learning to navigate through this area has made a world of difference in my life. I am hoping these concluding thoughts will be helpful for you as well.

In my old way of solving problems, I used to jump right into the "how" instead of taking time to get understanding around “what” the problem was exactly and “why” it had occurred. Using the following seven steps has helped me to slow down, and more importantly, step back so that I can not only solve it, but resolve it as well!

1. Stop and Pause. While it looks simple, this can be very difficult if our emotions are not in check.
   
2. Diffuse the Situation. It may help to start the conversation by asking, “I can tell you are upset, is this still a good time to talk?” This allows the other person an opportunity to take an emotional check as well.
   
3. Seek Clarification. Even if you think you know all of the facts, ask again. In other words, assume nothing!
   
4. Sympathize, Not Empathize. Rule of thumb: you can feel for the person, but not necessarily with the person.
5. Commit to Your Next Step. Tell the person what you plan to do to fix the situation. If necessary, share what you are going to do to gather more information.
6. Follow-Up. This step is often overlooked, yet can be incredibly insightful. Some of the best constructive feedback occurs in this conversation when the problem is resolved and emotions are diffused.
7. Learn and Apply. Many times, we treat a problem as a unique situation. It may actually have a pattern that can be fixed for the future.

Finally, just remember that within every problem lies a great opportunity. Most people are trying to do the right thing, but make mistakes along the way. The hidden opportunity may be your chance to prove that you are trustworthy, dependable, and deliver on what you promise.

Comments

[Dad]

Really a fine blog. What is interesting and calls for a future discussion is on point #4:
my version would be exactly opposite to yours. Ergo it would read: Empathize, not Sympathize.